It wasn’t easy to make the decision to write this blog under my real name, because I didn’t want to hurt my mom, and I still don’t. It’s extremely difficult to do this, because I love her to death, and want nothing more than for her and her long-time friends to know the love, joy and peace of God that I know, which passes all human understanding. Nevertheless, I believe it is crucial for the truth to be told openly and boldly, now more than ever, because the church has crossed far too many lines in making the Word of God of no effect by its traditions, changing doctrines, and man-made rules. So I proceed, purely out of love.
I sincerely hope that all those who are right now hurt and offended by these pages, will ponder these things in their hearts and someday come to understand and appreciate at least the good motives behind what is taking place here. As God is my witness, I don’t have a bitter bone in my body over my experience with the church. I’ve seen the effects of bitterness on the soul up close and personal, and want nothing to do with that. To the contrary, I have nothing but sadness and compassion for those still caught in the grips of the church’s man-made teachings, and just want their consciences to be freed from the chains of fallible church traditions accumulated over decades of May Meetings. I want them to be able to explore the Scriptures for themselves for the first time without the thought police telling them what they can and can’t believe. (If you think this is too extreme a statement, read this study of why the Bible doesn’t forbid wine, but the church does, and tell me if you have the right to believe that, let alone practice it, without getting permission from a Teacher. I think you know the answer.)
While I felt that the information here would be most effective (and most credible) if I stayed in the sunlight rather than the shadows of anonymity, there are a lot of reasons, many of them justified, for those who are commenting on this blog to want to remain nameless. Some of the anonymous commenters are defending the church’s doctrines, or Merie, or both, while some are past members, or children of current or past members.
I want to encourage all to post, and if anonymity helps that, so be it.
Those who have left the church and who have family still connected to it might be in fear of getting their family members publicly rebuked or otherwise intimidated into silence if church leaders found out they’ve been reading the information posted here. Those who are still in the church and who dissent from its teachings might want to protect their identities for fear of being “withdrawn from” or “marked and avoided.” I understand your motivation for remaining in the shadows.
What I don’t understand is the cloak of anonymity desired by those defending the church. What reason do you have for remaining anonymous? Shouldn’t you be willing to give a bold defense of your faith, or are you afraid of saying something that could get you in trouble with your superiors? Has God given you the Spirit of fear and timidity, or the Spirit of boldness?
I don’t believe I have exclusive insight from the Holy Spirit. Not by any means. Yet for a church that does make such a claim, I find its lack of confidence to openly defend its doctrines, and frankly, its clear lack of sound Biblical exegesis, troubling.
Speaking for all anonymous contributors; remaining in the shadows allows us to state our minds without the impact of our personal history. Just allow our comments to stand alone in their own power.
No one's message is helped by anonymity, it only detracts from it. The only thing making it necessary is the desire to protect oneself or one's loved ones from retribution in the form of public rebuke, withdrawal, marking and avoiding, or other forms of social intimidation. If you are the one claiming these things don't happen, then there should be no fear of commenting publicly.
Anonymous, it may be difficult for our host to empathize, not being "in" the sect for 10 or 20 years. Having family members in the sect is not the same as enduring dozens upon dozens of private interrogation sessions, almost weekly public reproofs of some sort, rebukes and humiliation while one is giving so much effort to keep "the schedule," study, raise many children, preach, teach, keep a full time job, go to all additional classes and meetings on top of the regular schedule, all the while being conditioned to believe one will never be adequate. Is there any wonder… Read more »
It sounds like maybe you misunderstood me. My only point was that those defending the church's doctrines should be bold enough to use their real name. If they're not, so be it, but I think their case would be more credible.
Also, I deeply empathize with you, which is the reason this blog exists. I'm happy to hear that it has been of help to so many people.
Anonymous who posted at 10PM. Thank you! You put into words what I experienced and saw happen to the people in this group every time we met for years. I know for me I'm still trying to heal many years later. The interrogations, verbal abuse and frequent humiliation for nothing does bad stuff to human beings and is damaging both emotionally, spiritually and physically (due to the stress).
Anonymous who posted at 10:23, I am deeply sorry for the grief you suffered and always know God loves you and you can be perfect in every way through the blood of Christ. I cannot reach you now but I give you a heartfelt, virtual cyber hug. I know what you felt because I was there for so long – I understand. Keep healing and remember JESUS is Lord, no matter what men say or do. Thank you for contributing.
And I quote, "no one's message is helped by anonymity." Coming out as bold as you have, it shows courage. We're grateful for this forum. Most of us do not feel heroic. We are broken. Does he not ask for the contrite heart and broken spirit? There is good in suffering, but oppression maketh a wise man mad.
Anonymous who posted at 10:39PM. Thank you so much for the love shown to me in your post, it brought tears to me eyes. Anonymous 10:50PM, "… maketh a wise man mad" so true & I had hunted for that scripture! Kevin, thank you so much for providing the forum for us to share and expose the whole truth here. We've all had to keep things secret for far too long and being able to share with others that understand is healing.
Anonymous Aug. 18th, 10:50….We are broken, we are oppressed, we are scared, we are scarred, we are confused, we are disillusioned, we are hurting, we are weak, we are barely holding on. We are SILENCED into anonymity.
Rebellion against tyranny is obedience to God!!
Or for some of us post anonymously because we were asked by a loved one to not use our name. They said they would be shamed if I were to use my true name. What kind of church judges its members based on what children or other relatives do? And more specifically, why does the church care what is said on a facebook page somewhere? The church's leadership's reaction to this blog and other pages is sadly predictable. On the other hand, its reaction serves to illustrate clearly many of the points made on this blog, and elsewhere.
Exactly. Thank you Anonymous.
One day about 7 yrs ago I had a medical situation I needed help with. I went to one of your houses and was told you could not help me because you were in the middle of a bible lesson. If you were one of the multiple people in that room then you know who I am. Can I just tell you that really hurt? What kind of example was that of "the one true church"? this is the kind of response you give to those of us you deem to be outside your circle. Someone said posters are getting… Read more »
I'm so sorry this happened to you, it was totally wrong and there is NO excuse and I mean none!! But unfortunately their behavior doesn't surprise me. You pointed to the perfect scripture, 2 Sam 12: 1-7 to describe their responses. If you had come to my congregation (mainstream COC, what this sect calls the "off church") there would have been more than one man coming to help you, that I'm sure of. In my church they care about people and not just members. I can still see you have faith in God in spite of the lack of mercy… Read more »
Anonymous Aug. 18th, 10:50….We are broken, we are oppressed, we are scared, we are scarred, we are confused, we are disillusioned, we are hurting, we are weak, we are barely holding on. We are SILENCED into anonymity.
Please do not be silenced any longer. You only have 1 life to live, it's time to LIVE it. Be the person God wants you to be, not the person Gary or Kim etc wants you to be or not be. Or wanted you to be if you no longer attend.